Well, it’s that time of year again … the most wonderful time of the yeeeeeeeeeear! The time when you get the Rowan Christmas Letter (We capitalize it out of respect.). I’ve heard many readers of the RCL have foregone the traditional reading of “Twas the Night Before Christmas” on Christmas Eve in favor of said letter. Bout time. I heard that old rag was based on scandalous lies anyway. Fun fact: the real name is “A Visit from St. Nicholas.” See, it’s all a big charade. Unbelievable.

Anyway, at the writing of this letter we’ve got approximately 20 days to live according to the Mayan calendar. So, let’s get moving. Like the kids say these days, YOLO, which is Canadian for “Hurry up and finish this letter before a giant asteroid obliterates the earth.” Or it means “Year-old liver and onions.” One of the two.

2012 has been good times for the Rowan household. This year marked 12 years married to the most wonderful creation the Good Lord ever put together. Jenny is the bee’s knees, the cat’s pajamas, and the monkey’s banana. (I made that last one up.) I couldn’t imagine doing life without her. She gets the girls ready for school every morning; takes care of the shorter ones all day; fixes breakfast, lunch and dinner; does the laundry; makes people awesome cakes; leads two small groups; combs my back hair; walks on water; heals the sick; cleanses the lepers; casts out demons; etc. I suggest saluting the next time you see her.

I go to work.

Elena Kay is wonderful young lady. Her foray into 2nd grade has been quite successful. Her reading skills are exemplary and has taken to reading a lot of Junie B books. Whatever that is. She also likes to read her Bible every night before going to sleep. Someone more cynical might say it’s a ploy to stay up later, but I’m all good with my 8 year old “gettin’ in the Word” every day. Train up a child, suckas!

Cassia started school this year. She’s not a big fan of the educational system. I kid. She’d rather be hanging out with Mommy, but who wouldn’t? She is doing a great job, as well. Also, if you need a good cuddle, Cassia knows what she is doing. She continues to provide the best one-liners in the family. This week after eating Jenny’s empanadas she said, “That was awesome! I burped loud like Dad!” Train up a child, suckas!

Josiah is a stud, obviously. He had his first year of soccer. He had fun. I yelled. Mostly, “KICK THE BALL!” He did score 3 goals – 2 in one game. He’s a great multi-tasker. Not only was he playing soccer, but at the same time he was admiring nature, being Spider-Man, wrestling his teammates and running in circles. Let’s see Lionel Messi do that. He also has a fan club at church mostly consisting of college-aged children’s workers who like to shout, “JOSIAAAAAAAAAAH!” whenever they see him.

Addie – what can you say? She is small, feisty and fully aware that she has all of us wrapped around her iddy, biddy, teeny, weeny, cutesy-wootsey woo finger. I like to call her Peepeeps, Neenutes, PreePreeps, Tinkletutes, etc. In Addie’s world, every chair is for climbing on, every drink is for drinking and every neck is for hugging. She almost has the dictionary memorized. That last part is a falsehood.

In reality, we have more than 20 days to live. We actually have eternity to live. Thanks to Jesus being born in a manger and eventually dying for our sins and rising again, we have the opportunity to live with Him forever. Not only that, He gave us abundant life right now. Despite what some doomsayers may think about the economy, politics, or anything else Jesus is still the KING of kings and LORD of lords. It’s all going according to plan. So, let’s have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

The Rowans love you.

So, I got a stylin’ new hairdo yesterday. Josiah seems to think otherwise, as does Jenny. Cassia is not sure what is going on up top. Elena Kay is on board with the crew cut, though. (She’s always been my favorite.) All the nice people on Facebook are encouraging me that it looks great. Yes, it great for getting a good view of my massive forehead.

The story goes like this. I walk in to DisasterCuts … I mean MasterCuts to get trimmed up for the holiday season. I proceed to explain that I want a “number two on the sides and back” and “leave it long on the top.” See picture to right for the outcome. Later I realized that the nice hair stylist was Asian and probably translated what I said to: “reave it rong on the top.” Ergo I am reft with the rong thing on my head.

As my forehead continues to grow as I get older I try to fake people out with longer hair and a combforward. It works out fairly well since the rest of my head (and back) have plenty of hair to spare. Well, one inch of hair does not make this plan viable. I’ve been exposed. I’m a hair fraud.

Last night Josiah gave me some hair tips to try to help me out. This morning when I walked downstairs, he took one look and said, “Your hair still like dat. Why?” Great question, Jobro. I’ve been asking the same question. WHY!?!?

Happy Thanksgiving. I’m thankful for hats

Some things were just meant to be. The story I get from my parents about naming me Mark has to do with them not wanting my name turned into a nickname like Joseph to Joe. Little did they know that Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch would be a worldwide sensation in the early 90s. Every Mark probably dealt with the same humiliation and variants thereof, i.e. Marky Mark and the Funky Smell.

Oddly enough, Marky Mark and I have the same exact body … no, not really.

Thankfully Mark Wahlberg and myself have moved on to bigger and better things. Wahlberg is responsible for cinematic greatness like Planet of the Apes and I’m responsible for letting people know how great Hackworth Reprographics is.

I shall use this forum to talk about marketing and all the minutia that it entails as well as what we are doing at Hackworth and how it benefits others.

I’ve had the great privilege of working in most forms of media like video production, web development, graphic design. I hope to bring insight in all areas through this blog.

Just remember …

It’s such a good vibration … It’s such a sweet sensation.

Yo it’s about that time
to bring forth the rhythm and the rhyme
I’m a get mine so get yours
I wanna see sweat comin’ out your pores
On the house tip is how I’m swinging this
strictly hip hop boy I ain’t singing this
Bringing this to the entire nation
black, white, red, brown
feel the vibration

Come on come on
Feel it feel it
Feel the vibration

And that is all for now.